


Into You

by skystarlight



Category: Super Junior
Genre: Fluff and Smut, Inspired by Music, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-29
Updated: 2018-07-29
Packaged: 2019-06-18 03:07:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,816
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15476271
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/skystarlight/pseuds/skystarlight
Summary: Inspired by Ariana Grande's song.





	Into You

2008_  15th August

It was rather confused, that night.

First of all the huge, tumultuous summer rain shower, sweeping the roads of Hong Kong, discouraging people from partying, have a drink together, getting their fun after a tiring week in the clenching fist of work routine. Roars in the wind, lightning bolts tearing the sky apart, wounding it. It bled in different colours, shades of gray and dark blue following one another in a chain, with sprinkles of purple and red here and there. The most furious clouds, probably, not to mention the rolling waves of the harbor, swirling menaciously as if ready to swallow whatever thing that happened to be at a close distance. 

Then, the room assignation. They were once again on the road, ready to massively promoting their music. 

It was a debut this time: Super Junior was ready to bring into the light a unque line-up to promote music in China, the group was ready to see Super Junior M's birth and witnessed, only a bunch of months prior, the success of its members going once again through the title of newbies in front of a sea of new spectators and potential fans.

It wasn't strange for the members to room together, assembled in couples very often - it was a safe decision to save some more money for the agency anyway - but what was strange at that point was Ryeowook's utter refusal to room again and again, and once again with Kyuhyun.

It was strange due to the fact that Kyuhyun was Ryeowook's best friend. They were almost inseparable, joined together at the hip so much that sometimes the older members made fun of this strong attachment of theirs.

"You two really look like lovers, always bickering. And when you aren't, you are so disgustingly lovey dovey!" had exclaimed Kangin one day, looking at how serene Ryeowook was, curled in Kyuhyun's arms, while sitting on the couch and watching a movie together, one of those spare times.

If only they knew...

...about Ryeowook's huge secret crush for Kyuhyun, whom he deemed as his; and Kyuhyun's oblivious response to Ryeowook's attention, which only increased confusion between them, as Ryeowook couldn't help but be oh so very delusional about every little thing that made as if Kyuhyun in truth really reciprocated his friend's feelings.

It was a whirlpool of wrong acts and impure thoughts. There was no other choice of words if you looked at Ryeowook, shyly glancing at Kyuhyun's figure in the dressing room and blushing like a schoolgirl lost in deep fantasies. And Kyuhyun himself wasn't of any help.

At first the lovely nicknames - Ryeonggu and Kyu Kyu - then the hugs getting more frequent, almost daily; the fits of jealousy if Ryeowook was anywhere near some other male singer chatting and exchanging smiles. Oh, the smiles... Once, after recording a video and sitting behind the camera to check the recorded footage, he found himself dumbly giggling while staring at that innocent smile growing brilliant and wider, and he understood that he only wanted to see Ryeowook smile in front of him, for him.

Then there was the stage of holding hands, wherever they went, both in private and in public. There was nothing bad in holding hands with your best friend, even considering all the culture behind same gender skinship in Korea. It was considered normal. 

What wasn't for sure, was how Ryeowook felt those little signals within himself: flurries of butterflies in the stomach, the insides clenching at every little gesture from Kyuhyun, the skip-beat his heart had to deal with each passing day.

There were nights he couldn't sleep because Kyuhyun had kissed him goodnight on the cheek and he turned and tossed under covers at the mere memory of his plum lips imprinting a peck on his skin. Heat was rising and his body was responding with signals of need. Pants getting tight, Ryeowook was now getting used to slowly let his hand slip by the waistband of his boxer and pleasuring himself while drowning in fantasies that, he knew, were bound to stay just as such.

Other nights instead, he simply cried himself to sleep because: "wake up Ryeowook! Everything is a product of your delusional mind! He will never be yours, he will never share the same feelings as you! He's just a friend, and like a friend he will stay to you!" and a fit of sobs erupted as Ryeowook pressed his face down onto the pillows to muffle his cries, and maybe even his breath. 

Because... what was life, if it couldn't be lived by Kyuhyun's side at its fullest? He was tired of shyly brushing his fingers against the younger man's and pretend it was an accident. He was tired to fake its interest and give advice whenever Kyuhyun had some dates with different girls. He was tired of the hugs Kyuhyun gave him, wounding him from behind and nuzzling his head in the crook of Ryeowook's neck, when he sneaked into the kitchen and found the older at the stoves, stirring their late dinners. 

And then, right when he was tired of pretending to be someone different and spill the truth - because knowing it or not, Kyuhyun was never to be his, so it was just better to say it all - Kyuhyun began sneaking into his room as well, looking for Ryeowook's warm, smaller body to hug in bed, in order to ease the incessant nightmares he had, as a memory of the accident that almost claimed its life.

How could he? How could he keep the mask of the faithful best friend, if everything he wanted was to realize those dreams that saw him forever and more by Kyuhyun side as his significant other: bickering for trivial matters, but always making peace; having dinner alone by themselves; chattering about the working day, the project they would take on; sipping a glass of red wine on the couch, snuggled together in front of a movie; perhaps making love, slowly, sweetly, to one another and lay naked in each other arms as the only way to warm up during long, cold winter nights. And then, if they were lucky enough, getting married, starting a family... enjoy life.

Ryeowook tried to erase his wishes and desires that night. He tried to by washing the bitter taste of unrequited love with the strong, dry one of red wine, a bottle that he had found in the self-service bar in his hotel room. He was too young to be prey of deceptive love, so, perhaps, it would be better to stop loving, in order not to suffer anymore. His heart woul deal with it. It would be probably taking long - too long - but he would succeed and love Kyuhyun just like a friend, nothing more.

That was why, he begged Donghae on his knees to exchange rooms and come to sleep with him instead of Kyuhyun. It was strange, the re quest itself and the way Ryeowook fought in order not to spill useless tears, however, in the end, he gave in and took from Kyuhyun the room key, giving him the one to his former room to share with Siwon. 

While slurring down gulp after gulp of the ruby red liquid, Ryeowook found himself alone in the room, waiting for Donghae to come and lecture him about how he shouldn't drink that much and risk to collapse. A tired smile stretched on his lips as his eyes were fixated on the thick window glass and the raindrops that splattered against the panel. He even started counting them while they created abstract paths, roads that brought to nowhere, like his decision.

Whom he wanted to fool? 

Alike the rain incessantly tapping the window, teardrops surged from his tired eyes and streaked his soft, blushing cheeks. He started laughing like an idiot for being such uselessly and hopelessly in love. Even by putting a physical barrier between him and Kyuhyun - be that a door, a wall, indefinite distant miles - his heart was clenched in pain, stabbed until there was nothing but a deep, bleeding wound, he was hurting and he knew he couldn't keep that farce. Hell, he didn't even last one day from the decision to swap rooms and there he was, crying like a fool, behaving like the worst drunkard in search of the next bottle.

They sat all on the ground. Three, open and finished, trophies of an aching pain that couldn't set his heart free, but instead pierced through his chest like a drill and there it stayed. Until Ryeowook, tired to even look outside the window, searching the raging skies for an answer, with eyes full of hope, rested himself on the single mattress and hugged his pillow, recalling the infinte times that Kyuhyun used to hold him against the chest in that same position. 

Tiredness was overwhelming and he soon fell asleep, prey of other sweet, unattainable dreams.

A knock on the door disturbed him, but the poisonous effect of alcohol had been way stronger than any other intrusions in his mind. Ryeowook didn't even budge. Neither then, nor when the soft knocks became regular and slightly more intense.

"Stop it!" a single hiss, followed by a slap and a whine escaped through gritted teeth "What if he's deep asleep?" the first voice asked, lowtone.

"Then I'll have to wake him up" a second voice, probably the one of the person who had been hit by the first one, said with a careless shrug.

"He doesn't want to see you" the first one replicated again, swiftly grabbing his companion's wrists before he could slam both fists on the door "Go back to your senses Cho Kyuhyun! This is a hotel, it's past two in the morning and people are sleeping! Ryeowook might be too"

Kyuhyun sighed, rolling his eyes at the lecture he was receiving from Donghae, whom he had lured out of the room with a trick, his intention being stealing his room key and finally meeting Ryeowook again.

"I said I don't care!" Kyuhyun hissed back, enraged by thinking that there was someone plotting against him seeing his best friend somehow "Why are you keeping me away from him? Why doesn't he want to see me?!" he asked, rage and doubts fully palpable in his tone of voice.

"I thought you could give me the answer!" Donghae shrugged, looking lost at the very question. After all, Ryeowook had simply asked him the favor, without telling him the reason why he had to keep away from Kyuhyun; he had simply assumed the two maknaes had fought like they usually did and he wanted to avoid breathing the same air as Kyuhyun for a little while.

"I fucking don't know why he'd avoid me!" Kyuhyun looked exasperated "Give me that damn key and I'll discover it. When I get to know why he's behaving like a cranky ass, then I'll tell you as well!" 

"Language maknae!" Donghae's eyebrow rose in dismay. He looked at Kyuhyun for a while, noticing how bad and lost he was for not being with the person he cared the most for in the group. A sigh, another one and a brief glance at the only metallic key hung at a large keychain with the number 924, before thinking the better of it and finally handing it to Kyuhyun. He snatched the other one away and scoffed: "It's no use fighting with you, right? Listen, I am gonna get my deserved rest. Don't disturb him and go to sleep as well!" 

"Okay" Kyuhyun grinned his victory.

"Promise me..." Donghae poked him in the chest, looking doubtful of his words.

Kyuhyun rolled his eyes for a last time: "I promise you, I will open this door and go straight to sleep like a good, obedient child"

"Good boy" Donghae smiled, eyes scrunched up into two crescents as he looked satisfied. He ruffled Kyuhyun's hair once and greeted him goodnight, before turning away and reaching the elevator.

Kyuhyun shrugged as he watched Donghae walking away. It was always too easy to win over him, Donghae was so pure and innocent like a true kid, but that behavior surprised Kyuhyun still. With a huge grin of satisfaction, and breath unexplicably hitched in the throat, he turned the key in the hole and finally opened the door that was keeping him away from the only person he really needed to see.

There he was: Kim Ryeowook before his eyes, laying on his hip on the bed, curled like a baby in the crib and still hugging the pillow. His clothes were all crumpled and his hair messily sticking out in all directions. His t-shirt was caught in between his body and the mattress, resulting in being a bit lifted over his hip, exposing more than a few inches of skin. He was being kissed by light of those occasional thunderbolts that still appeared in the darkness, and his already clear complexion was lit in silver and gold, shining while surrounded by dark everywhere. 

Kyuhyun held his breath and when he realized he wasn't breathing anymore and about to collapse, he released it, together with a gulp that unexplicably made both his throat and chest ache in so much pain.

Never had Kyuhyun thought that he could wish to be in the same room as Ryeowook more than that same precise instant.

How many times had he watched him sleep and Ryeowook's serene features somehow were too contagious that made him almost instantly feel at peace with the entire world? But that was just when he sneaked into the older one's room and joined him in bed. However his fantasies were suddenly shattered as an easily recognizable smell hit his nose and he realized that was wine completely stenching the room, the three empty bottles still sitting on the carpeted floor.

Kyuhyun shook his head as he cautiously approached the bed and thought of what could upset Ryeowook that much. So much that he needed to keep a fair distance with him, that was his best friend. And then, there were those other times, that he wished what he had with Ryeowook could trascend the imposed limits of friendship. Just then, he thought, only then he could really and seriously understand what was happening underneath Ryeowook's silent fighter's armor. And help him.

He sat on the mattress, making sure not to make it creak too much and wake Ryeowook up, and soon Kyuhyun's eyes were all over his friend's smaller frame, softened by the sight of all his fragility, yet resistance to all kind of troubles. Ryeowook's body ended up rolling a bit towards Kyuhyun and the younger man was now watching the older laying on his back, belly button peeking from the clothes, cheeks flushed in red and a small smile on his lips as he litfed both hands and fisted them lightly at his head's sides.

Oh gosh. He looked marvelously beautiful, drowning in that fake innocence that was conveyed to him because of the too high level of alcohol flowing in his veins.

Kyuhyun lifted a hand and almost imperceptibly let his fingertips brush on his forehead, sweeping it clear of some annoying locks that had fallen into Ryeowook's eyes. And when his hand wasn't preceived as anything disturbing, Ryeowook let out a peaceful sigh, even allowing Kyuhyun's hand to fondly travel deeper into his soft hair, for many more caresses to come.

"Why?" Kyuhyun whispered, perfectly conscious that Ryeowook couldn't reply in that state "Why in the world are you avoiding me? It's been all day long now since our arrival in Hong Kong. I...can't sleep without you near me" Kyuhyun revealed, feeling his own cheeks blushing for that revelation "You know that by now, don't you?" 

A hum emerged from Ryeowook's lips, who looked even more content for who knew what exact reason. His lips parted to let out a sigh of contentment and a word that Kyuhyun couldn't hear very well, but that for sure started with a guttural sound, like a "g" or "c".

"C-cold? Are you cold?" Kyuhyun asked, doubling over Ryeowook and trying to get his ear closer to the older man's mouth, just to be sure of hearing the correct words. He hovered over the lying body and grasped a corner of the bedsheet, with the intention of pulling them over Ryeowook like a flipping wallet, keeping him warm as he desired, however the same guttural sound came and this time Kyuhyun heard it perfectly well: "Kyu... Kyu..." the older sighed contentedly.

Shock clicked into him and, losing his balance, he only ended up crashing onto Ryeowook's chest, hitting him hard and inevitably making him scream in pain.

"Sorry, sorry, sorry! I'm sorry!" Kyuhyun urged to apologize, planting both palms onto the mattress as he tried to lift himself from the now furiously wriggling and fully awake Ryeowook: "What the..." he screamed, eyes fluttering open and fear instilled in his shimmering dark eyes. Ryeowook began to blindly hit the target that had easily knocked him on the bed.

"Ryeowook! Wook, it's me! Stop hitting me!" Kyuhyun groaned, as he very well knew that Ryeowook could be one of a hell hitter with his hands as weapon.

"K-Kyu?" Ryeowook slurred, a bite because of sleep, a bit because of the drunk alcohol. He stopped hitting Kyuhyun and stilled, weightlessly falling back on to the mattress, arms spread wide to let his friend get up.

Kyuhyun tried to go over the hit spots and massage them a little bit, but it was useless: "Yup, it's me I said" he groaned, tilting his head on each side to check that his neck could count on all its vertebra like before.

"Wh-what...are you doing here?" Ryeowook asked, blinking several times after turning on the lamp on the nightstand and glancing over at Kyuhyun from head to toe. He was wearing his baggy shorts and a black t-shirt with one of his favorite videogames character.

"Passing by?" Kyuhyun shyly smiled, rubbing the back of his neck. Ryeowook crawled on his back until he could lift himself to sit against the headboard, legs casually thrown open as he really couldn't get a hold of his body response. It moved without his mind inputting any order.

"Bullshit" Ryeowook scoffed, lifting a knee and placing an elbow onto it as that same hand ran through his hair, disheveling it more than was possible.

Kyuhyun carefully eyed him from head to toe. there was definitely something alluring in his petite best friend, especially in that condition. Because, although it wasn't surely the first time he could see him drunk - countless were the times in which Ryeowook came home after dinner with co-workers and resulted a bit happier than normal - Kyuhyun always found him this tad more beautiful: with eyes glistening in the dark, that involuntary smirk stretching on his thin lips, a peach pink blush decorating his defined cheekbones, that habit of his of playing with his hair making it look infinitely sexier when messy, not to mention the mania of saying too many "I love yous" to the wrong people. Including Kyuhyun.

The younger gulped. It wasn't of any help trying to calm down when the view he secretly liked was all in front of his eyes. And mentally saying that he didn't know the reason for that reaction was useless as well. Not when Ryeowook looked straight into his eyes, bearing his gaze, and unconsciously bit his lower lip. Was that a challenge? Or an invitation? 

Kyuhyun's mind was a hell of confusion, a whirlpool of should or shouldn't, an intricate maze of images that he used to see in his more private dreams only and that now resurfaced all at the same time, portraying the familiar figures of the two main protagonists wrapped in each other's embrace, whispering sweet nonsense, protected just by the thin layers of some bed sheets rustling on naked skins. In his dreams Ryeowook was always the one contentedly cuddled on his chest and he could never grow tired of watching over his secret lover's sleep. He could do it every night, over and over again, until the sun rose and his lover's eyes slowly fluttered open, almost shy to see and understand the mechanisms of the love just shared infinite times, each one more intense than the previous. 

But Kyuhyun understood, he always did, at least in his own dreams, and always forgave Ryeowook for feeling very little trusty towards what they had between them. It was a double-edged knife and for that it could be more dangerous than death itself.

"You don't even listen!" Ryeowook scoffed and stretched a little the leg that was still laying on the mattress, almost kicking Kyuhyun in the process "I said that I don't believe a word that you said, that you always have a reason for everything! Including intruding like thief in my room!" and with those words, Kyuhyun's wild fantasies shattered in million pieces.

"W-why?" Kyuhyun never had to act that nervous in front of Ryeowook before, however his heart was telling him a complete different story right then. It had been a damn whole day of watching Ryeowook being so freaking cold and distant, and the situation was so fucking absurd in its whole that it was driving him totally insane. First the seating plan on the plane, then taking two different vans for the hotel transfer from the airport, passing by having dinner without Ryeowook actually showing up at all and Donghae almost ordering him to switch bedroom because "Ryeowook expressly asked that I room with him these days".

A sigh first, then the question: "Why are you avoiding me then? If you know everything, you should have seen this question coming!" Kyuhyun snapped, direct, almost too much that Ryeowook had to blink a few times to actually understand what Kyuhyun had just asked him.

Ryeowook shrugged, eyes finally averting his best friend's and looking elsewhere. His fingers played with the sheets scattered all around him: "Wrong" he sighed "I'm not avoiding you. You're just too much of an obnoxious, self-centered brat for thinking that people live in function of your existence. And I am not. So take it off your mind"

"I can't!" Kyuhyun was about to loos that little self control he had so hardly gathered so far "It's not only this that I can't take off my mind! You can't...you can't understand...it's you, that annoying thing that I can't take off my mind!" he exploded, springing forward to grab Ryeowook's shoulders and shake him a little, who knows he could finally register his words somehow.

"Tell me how am I supposed to behave around you, to stop being jealous of others talking with you, joking with you, breathing the same air as you do!" Kyuhyun exhaled "It's been a while now and it's so obvious that I act so possessive of you, though I don't even know why!"

Ryeowook snorted, wriggling free of Kyuhyun's hold, putting unnecessary distance: "I might have an answer to that, but I am not sure this is what you want to hear..." he crossed arms over his chest, feeling it uselessly thumping, earning for some words that, up to that very moment, he had only thought would be the product of a dream. He perfectly knew that Kyuhyun was a jealous, possessive brat towards whomever approached him too closely, however he had never voiced that little hope incessantly drilling his mind. Ryeowook had never quite wanted to delude himself into thinking that Kyuhyun might have started feeling something more than friendship or brotherly love towards him.

"I don't care, answer me!" Kyuhyun pleaded, still trying to reach for Ryeowook, but getting nothing more than other distance as Ryeowook dodged his hand reaching out to him "See? I don't want you to keep on pushing me away like you are doing now. You started being elusive around me a few weeks ago, when you stopped laughing at my jokes, when you purposely ran away from anything I might have suggested to do together, when you hid behind stupid excuses and work reasons when I perfectly knew that you went nowhere but hiding in the dorms! Why? I swear I'm going insane!"

"Oh, you are the one going insane?!" Ryeowook scoffed, turning his head to watch Kyuhyun gripping the sheets in order to calm down his irrepressible drive to jump on Ryeowook and show him how much he meant the world to him with only a hug. Ryeowook's eyes, lightly widened at the affirmation, were firmly focused on Kyuhyun's confused, lost expression, which was making him even more dumbfounded on what to do with his best friend.

Perhaps...it was time. If everything was meant to end that brutally between them, then maybe it was better doing it quickly to avoid much more pain in the process. Or at least that was what Ryeowook was constantly thinking of while watching Kyuhyun nervously chewing on his lip.

"Please, Kyu..." he murmured, head still a bit dizzy after drinking way too much to handle. Ryeowook crawled farther away from Kyuhyun and sheltered himself as much as he could "Don't make it harder...."

"Why would it be hard?" Kyuhyun tilted his head and tried to get a glimpse of Ryeowook, who was holding his head in both hands and let his fingers run through his messy hair "Hey..." the younger finally made it to grasp Ryeowook's arm and lightly squeezed it without encountering any resistance. He heard Ryeowook sofly sobbing, face hidden in his palms "...Ryeong?" 

How sweet that name sounded when pronounced by Kyuhyun, Ryeowook wasn't so sure to be lasting long.

"Tell me. If I did something to make you angry, just tell me and I'll fix it, I-"

Ryeowook strongly tugged his arm out of the grasp and slapped the hand away: "You did nothing! It's me! I need to be fixed!" he snapped, eyes fiery and veiled with threatening tears "Say, Kyu. One question and everything will change, are you ready to hear it?" the smaller man asked, voice trembling just like his scared figure. He was still trying to cuddle himself in that crouched position of his, desperately clinging on to that little hope he could find shelter while hearing the disastrous answer that would change his relationship with Kyuhyun forever.

Kyuhyun retracted his hand and placed it in his lap, a gesture of resignation that had never crossed his player-set-like mind, but that Ryeowook's strange and elusive behavior occasionally made him do. His eyes though couldn't leave his best friend's and gazed into him as best as he could, trying to find in those dark, shimmering well the answer to all his questions.

"Go on" he said, in a challenging tone despite his sigh "Whatever this is, I won't escape"

"Are you sure?" Ryeowook repeated, his alcohol-induced happiness quickly shifting into despair.

Heart pounding ever so fast, that he'd rather tear it from his chest and throw it away, Ryeowook felt himself in suspension over a bottomless gorge, waiting for that little nod that Kyuhyun inevitably gave him.

"Well, then" Ryeowook passed his hand through his hair for a last time and nervously let out a little laugh "K-Kyu... - he difficulty gulped down the knot that had left his throat dry and almost sore - do you like me?" he asked with a little smile, that wasn't surely intended, because all Ryeowook could think of - or not think, since he was in deep pain and that needed all his focus - was a chain of curses directed to himself for purposely screwing up the only relationship he'd always cherished more than life itself.

Kyuhyun's eyes widened. His face was a painting of confusion and he didn't know how to react.

His hesitation was the last drop. Ryeowook quickly - too quickly - moved and sprang off the bed, his intention being the one of fleeing the room and disappear from Kyuhyun's sight. That...that was really enough. Watching Kyuhyun not even having a tiny bit of consideration for what was once their friendship. That was a bad shot to take, espescially from the man he considered being his best friend first of all and over all.

"O-of course I like you!" Kyuhyun blurted all of a sudden, quickly grasping Ryeowook's wrist and stopping him in place right while the older was about to successfully pass him by. 

Ryeowook gasped and stopped in his track, feeling dumb enough that his knees would have probably given in to his weight anytime soon: "W-what?" he asked, his voice yet another wavering murmur in the darkness, another sigh caught up in his throat and he felt like about to choke if he didn't manage to restore his breathing ability.

"I said that I like you! What a stupid question, Ryeong..." with a brief roll of the eyes Kyuhyun pulled him and Ryeowook magically ended up sitting on Kyuhyun's lap, his face ever so close to the one of his crush. Ryeowook bit his lip nervously; it wasn't like he had never seen Kyuhyun's face that closely - infinite were the times in which they had to play kissing games or similar stuff, not to mention the nights in which Kyuhyun sneaked into his bed to sleep together - however he had never seen Kyuhyun's eyes shimmering with such a fervor and determination before.

Ryeowook gave himself the luxury to think that maybe...just maybe...it could be different this time, if only Kyuhyun hadn't thought of ruining everything beforehand.

"Were you afraid of this? Of asking me if I like you?" Kyuhyun asked, his eyes never leaving Ryeowook's about-to-cry-ones. Ryeowook nodded, a little gesture to justify his deep fright. And it was just a reaction following his eternal doubts, but his hand slowly crept on Kyuhyun's chest and fisted his t-shirt out of nervousness.

The soothing caresses on his back were about to lull him to sleep. He would have wanted to sleep again in Kyuhyun's arms and never wake up if that was the heavenly result, but he couldn't think of anything else but the outcome of his relationship with the fellow member. Would it level up? Would it downgrade? Who knew...Ryeowook for sure didn't.

"We are..." Kyuhyun cleared his voice, strangely lowered of a few tones and not sounding like his at all, before nervously answering "...friends, aren't we? I like you so much! There's nothing to be afraid of! And if I did something that bothered you or made you angry, you need to tell me" he smiled, trying to reassure Ryeowook, but not knowing that his reassurance had just shattered his best friend's heart forever, instead of healing it for good.

Ryeowook lowered his head, warm drops of water already too late to stop from falling down his cheeks. Kyuhyun briefly saw him crying before he watched Ryeowook bitterly smiling back to him and confirming Kyuhyun's fears: "You...just did. You made me angrier than before, Kyu. And, this is what I couldn't tell you for so long" Ryeowook's hand travelled on Kyuhyun's neck and upper towards his face. He cupped the younger's cheek and caressed it twice, before leaning in and gently overlapping his thin lips onto Kyuhyun's plumpier ones. 

Ryeowook briefly closed his eyes, urging other tears to fall during the act he had so bravely only dared to dream of doing with the Kyuhyun his fantasy wanted to be his boyfriend. He never saw the initial shock in Kyuhyun's eyes subsiding into tenderness very quickly, as the younger's arms enclosed Ryeowook's small waist and pulled him towards his chest, letting their lips being not the only point of contact betwen them.

The kiss wasn't anything near to what Ryeowook had always been dreaming of - something sensual, a tacit game of understanding between lovers - it was slow and sweet with both parties timidly tasting each other in a few pecks aimed at gently suck each other's lips. It was a kiss charged with what seemed like a bitter goodbye. At least to Ryeowook so it was.

"I hate myself" he breathed, his lips still brushing against Kyuhyun's as he spoke, his eyes unwilling to open to realize his friend's shock over the kiss "For so long the only problem between us has been me. And now that I ruined everything, I screwed our friendship, I feel better within myself, because now you know why I keep distant and push you away"

Ryeowook found his courage and opened his eyes to get a glimpse of wonderment in Kyuhyun. It was nothing terrible, no horror nor disgust, it was just the same Kyuhyun as always looking straight into his puffy eyes and not budging at all. He simply kept listening and the only thing that Ryeowook felt strange, was just Kyuhyun not showing any sign of letting him go.

"Shit, I-I'm sorry... I... W-we aren't friends anymore, I guess" Ryeowook forced his sight away from that frozen seriousness Kyuhyun was emanating, it was almost chilling. A corner of his lips curved into a grin that was just the beginning of a fit of laughters, pretty much hysetrical, considering that Ryeowook was fighting the urge to fall on his knees and shamelessly beg Kyuhyun to either forgive and forget him, or try to love him back although that would have been another very delusional wish of him, to be honest.

But then a hand cupped his face and gently pushed it to look back straight.

Ryeowook finally saw Kyuhyun smile at him and he felt a renewed impulse of crying so much, pouring all his heart in those tears and at the same time grasp Kyuhyun's t-shirt as if it was the only mean to survive and not fal back into that deep gorge he had always felt being suspended over: "K-Kyu..." he croaked in confusion, as soon as he felt Kyuhyun's hands beginning to caress him ever so gently and with much respect "...if everything is eventually bound to fall apart, please, please... make love to me at least once"

Ryeowook felt his cheeks burning under Kyuhyun's caresses because of the blunt request, and immediately dove to hide into the crook of the other man's neck "I swear I'll get over you and behave myself, I swear!" Ryeowook sobbed, putting even more strength into the grasps he had made of Kyuhyun's t-shirt.

And he was waiting for Kyuhyun to laugh, mock him for being overly blunt while pushing such embarassing requests, he was waiting for Kyuhyun to express his disgust and leave him alone like the pitiful being he was, however he could never imagine that what Kyuhyun actually did was simply laying him down onto the mattress, in a gentle way not even his dreams had ever described. Soon Kyuhyun was over him and their eyes met at the same height.

"You should have told me about it much earlier, instead of living with this secret weighing on your heart" Kyuhyun sighed a bit bothered, but soon smiled showing comprehension over the matter. A finger under Ryeowook's lashes caught another teardrop "Just think. If we hadn't ended in this kind of strange dead end, we would have spent many other years chasing each other without even having a shot at love"

"W-what?" Ryeowook's eyes widened, he grabbed Kyuhyun's hand in his and pressed his fingers around the larger hand, pulling it away.

"You heard very well, Ryeong" Kyuhyun's smile briefly disappeared as he left space to voice his thoughts out loud "Yes, I may be dense and oblivious and clumsy when it comes to this, but don't you ever stop a moment and ask yourself why I'm so jealous, possessive and over-protective of you?" 

Ryeowook gasped in shock, breath caught in his throat he covered his mouth to conceal the stupor that he felt following the fresh revelation.

"And I thought you knew how much I love you..." Kyuhyun puffed his cheeks and clumsily pouted like a wronged child. He propped himself on both arms and lowered just a little bit to lean in and kiss Ryeowook's forehead after swiping his bangs away "I mean, I don't understand if I love you the way a man does, but I know that between having you or losing you, I'd rather die if I ever let the second option to happen" Kyuhyun sighed, as he proceeded to cover Ryeowook's face in sweet pecks.

"I... I love you Kyu" Ryeowook revealed as he felt Kyuhyun's body softly pressing onto his own. It was the first time he did it to voice what was really going on withing his heart and mind "I really do"

"I know" Kyuhyun murmured. His breath warm against Ryeowook's neck skin as he proceeded to kiss him there as well "At least, now I know"

"So... you don't hate me for feeling this thing towards you?"

"Why would I?" Kyuhyun lifted his body of a few inches and went back to stare into Ryeowook's eyes full of uncertainty.

"I should't feel this way! I shouldn't love you at all!" Ryeowook breathed, by then very much sorrowful towards the whole situation.

"Listen, Ryeong" Kyuhyun's knee slipped between Ryeowook's legs and slowly positioned itself there to anchor his body over the petite one of the other singer "I myself am very confused as per why I feel this way for you. I haven't concluded the thing I feel for you is love yet, but I don't hate you and never will. I said I'd die instead of losing you, so... don't ask too many questions and help me falling properly in love with you, because I feel I'm already on the right path to lose my mind over you" Kyuhyun urged him in that rethorical way he only knew how to use "And I already have..."

Hypnotically enough, and still feeling dazed and confused, Ryeowook's lips stretched in a wide smile, before his chest - already thumping with the life his heart had gained back from the new conversation - began moving in little spasms, showing signs of his contagious laugh "You have?" Ryeowook giggled as tears magically stopped flowing and were replaced by that natural laugh that marked him differently from the other members.

"Why are you laughing?" Kyuhyun asked, playfully irritated, throwing a pillow at him. Ryeowook took it right into the face but wasn't the least botehred, if that was the outcome he was ready to receive other tons of pillows or even start a war.

"I think I'm happy" Ryeowook whispered, cupping Kyuhyun's face and lifting it so that their eyes met again and their gazes melted into an unique loving one.

"You think or you are" Kyuhyun climbed a bit more over his defenseless prey and asked, cocking an eyebrow in suspicion "Or you're simply drunk still. I'd choose the latter"

"Drunk...on you?" Ryeowook laughed again and pulled Kyuhyun's face in for another kiss "How do I make you completely fall for me?" the older asked, lips still about molded with Kyuhyun's.

"Be yourself, simple" Kyuhyun shrugged lightly "And never chase me out of your bedroom. The result will have me always run after you and sneak into your bed, no matter what" the younger replied with a knowing wink. After a while he dove back to ravish Ryeowook's neck in kisses, until he unconsciously slipped both hands under Ryeowook's t-shirt and start caressing his torso under the garment.

Ryeowook threw his head back and giggled to himself, completely enjoying Kyuhyun's actions, for he had never imagined all his dreams could come true one day.

 

Those slender fingers ghosted on his skin, making it burn in desire. The way Kyuhyun swiped all his digits on the most sensitive areas of his skin was driving him crazy: both hands wholly held him in place at the height of the ribs; his thumbs caressed him plenty of times until both reached his nipples and stroked them to life, earning a couple of muffled moans from the silently submissed man.

Kyuhyun moved both hands lower and held Ryeowook by the waist, pulling him a bit higher so that Ryeowook had to slightly arch his back and lift his hips in order to let Kyuhyun's lips meet his ab muscles, a plain sketched in curves completely redrawn by Kyuhyun's butterfly kisses and occasionally swipe of the tongue.

Ryeowook gasped again and a couple of shivers rolled down his back when the point of Kyuhyun's curious tongue played with his belly button. He instinctively held his hips higher for Kyuhyun to work better with his mouth, and let the taller man settle himself in between his shaking legs.

Without stopping licking the stripes of milky white skin, Kyuhyun lifted his eyes and watched how Ryeowook was silently suffering from the lack of general action. The petite man was obediently lying on his back on the sheets scattered here and there, which he occasionally fisted in order to release a bit of his frustration.

Ryeowook closed his eyes and let his body be totally abandoned to the sensations subsequently following after Kyuhyun had ever so slowly grabbed the hem of his shorts and pulled them down in one, painfully slow go together with his boxers.

Now totally naked and exposed, he felt as if he was swimming in total relax and calmness, caressed by the breeze, kissed in his every part by Kyuhyun, diligently at work to cause him pleasure. Ryeowook's eyes didn't see what was happening, but his other senses could help him figure out almost perfectly what was happening over his body. Sovereign of them all was touch, wholly involved when it came to focus on whatever Kyuhyun was doing on his body with his skillful mouth and tongue: kissing his waist, biting his skin, sucking when needed, licking his groins to travel further down.

The petite man groaned as he felt Kyuhyun prepotently pushing both thighs back and parting them a little bit wider.

Even the smallest of Kyuhyun's body parts could make him shiver in pleasure, as the man's hair often tickled his stomach while he was intent at licking the sensitve member already standing proud and about. Kyuhyun soon stopped licking only to begin sucking it following a steady rhythm. Ryeowook's heart accelerated its pace, his chest was way too narrow to contain that blooming euphoria, or his stomach too small to keep in that heat quickly accumulating somewhere below his waistline.

With a succsession of groans he was shamefully displaying, Ryeowook kept one hand safe on the sheets underneath his body, but the other was moved almost too fast on Kyuhyun's hair, insistently running through the silky locks before even starting to pull and yank them accordingly to each of Kyuhyun's engulfing moves around his leaking member. He only wanted to feel the explosion, and he was so sure he was near it, he could feel it, however he also knew that it was so painfully useless to let the whole lovemaking stop at merely foreplays.

This had never been what he had wished for. Not after finally getting Kyuhyun all for himself.

"Wait, wait you greedy brat, I'm gonna come if you keep on going like this" Ryeowook exhaled in between shallow breaths. He reached for Kyuhyun's shoulders and pushed him away, already regretting his move since he was feeling at loss and a lot more exposed than what he was.

Kyuhyun licked his lips and grinned as he straightened his back and sat on his knees: "I thought that would eventually be the outcome" he ecstatically smiled as he looked down at his companion and how lovely his flushed red cheeks were.

"I preferred when you were on your knees giving me a blowjob, you're talking too much right now" Ryeowook rolled his eyes but chuckled, not wanting to be any mean.

"You stopped it. You are to blame" Kyuhyun grinned for the second time, before diving towards Ryeowook and placing his lips onto the petite man's. Ryeowook could still taste himself on those plump lips but he couldn't care less. Every single time Kyuhyun kissed him was a spell he dreaded to break.

His arms rose and automatically found their way around Kyuhyun's neck, which he grasped and lightly caressed with the tip of his fingers, drawing circles and hearts as he pulled Kyuhyun even closer while following each of his head tilts in order to follow the growing pace.

Soon he moaned in the fast running kiss. He was completely at loss of air as he followed Kyuhyun's lips sucking his own, licking and playfully biting, to the point he had to briefly stop him and push him away, dumbly laughing for his own being silly. Kyuhyun laughed with him as well, but quick enough planted some pecks at the corner of Ryeowook's mouth, on his cheeks, on his nose, making his petite partner squirm in contentment: "I love you, no matter what" Kyuhyun murmured, restarting his kisses on Ryeowook's giggling lips. His tongue swiped along the seam of those two full red lines that he made expressly open up only for himself, only to slide his tongue inside Ryeowook's mouth and savour every inch of it during the dance just engaged by their greedy tongues.

Moans after moans, the two kept kissing each other more fervently than ever, as if their was a last kiss before bidding a sad farewell, and luckily it wasn't just the case, or their fervor would have been way stronger, almost desperate to let go.

"I love you too" Ryeowook replied in what was merely a whisper against Kyuhyun's lips, their foreheads rested against each other as a sign of understanding of their souls' deepest parts. 

Kyuhyun hovered over Ryeowook, propping himself on one elbow, as the other hand was too busy at still touching and caressing the soft features of that silky smooth skin of the man he was making love to. Ryeowook moaned again as Kyuhyun body pushed against his own, their stomachs brushed and Kyuhyun, in order to settle himself in a more comfortable position between Ryeowook's legs, purposefully made their crotches grind to create friction.

Almost istinctively, the petite man spread his legs wider and pleaded: "Isn't it time to stop playing around and make me yours?"

Kyuhyun's eyebrow cocked and he questioned: "Aren't you feeling mine enough already?" knowing for sure what kind of reaction was about to come from Ryeowook. In fact he slapped him on he back once, hoping to have hit the target hopefully strong enough to teach Kyuhyun a lesson: "You are talking too much" Ryeowook pouted "Enter me, I need you"

Kyuhyun smiled and quickly pressed his lips once more on Ryeowook's, before reaching down to touch his own lenght. He stroked it a few times, quickly, roughly, the needed to keep the flicker of desire still lit within himself, nothing too difficult to be honest, however soon he grabbed in his hand Ryeowook's too and kept on delicately stroking them together, while Ryeowook was still visibly focused on mantaining his self control and not give in to the urge of moaning way too louder than possible.

"P-please..." Ryeowook moaned, closing his eyes shut and arching his back one more.

"No one will need you more than I do, Ryeong" Kyuhyun spoke in between those pecks directed under Ryeowook's jaw after profiting of the fact that the petite one had also thrown his head back and was basically offering his body to that engulfing embrace that was provided by Kyuhyun's arms.

Ryeowook exhaled a short breath while, eyes shut close and all the more defenseless, Kyuhyun decided to stop playing and directed his throbbing member towards the still unteased entrance. A couple of grunts and a long moan accompanied Kyuhyun's task as he pushed himself painfully slowly deep into Ryeowook and stilled when completely inside.

He looked down at his partner and watched Ryeowook's flushed cheeks adorably burning, his kiss-abused chest gleaming with pearls of sweat running down his collarbone, the way he had finally replaced that something to grip with all his strength from the sheets underneath his body, to the biceps of Kyuhyun's arms, and his nails still dug into the flesh as Ryeowook quickly breathed, not aiming to stop anytime soon.

"Move" Ryeowook ordered with a low-toned, strangely unfamiliar voice. Another murmur, but Kyuhyun took it as the only signal missing to finally start pounding and hitting the spots, he knew, Ryeowook took the most of his pleasure from. 

Slowly, almost unacceptably slowly, Kyuhyun started gaining his rhythmic pace, as his lenght sunk into the warm, tight spot and got it used to the intrusion, almost abusing as Kyuhyun resorted to all his animalistic drives, but never violent. After all, Ryeowook was the most beautiful flower ever plucked from a garden, and his.

Hearing Ryeowook painfully pleading for more was making his ego grow bigger and stronger, Kyuhyun felt powerful as he claimed as his the petite man's body, his wholehearted attention, his love. 

The voice he absolutely loved hearing singing with all his heart now was lamenting a succession of moans, disrupted only by shallow breaths and syllables of his name feverishly slipping out of those swollen lips, repetitively kissed and bitten.

"Kyu...K-kyuhyun..." Ryeowook arched his back once more, his legs closed around the taller man's hips and with that move, he tried to pull him closer than possible already "Fast...faster" Ryeowook ordered, before Kyuhyun could grab both his thighs and held them spread to comply with the request. 

Knees slipped a bit onto the sheets, but he found the way to keep up the position and, having learnt the way, Kyuhyun began to move just how Ryeowook had just requested: quicker, rougher, the moves were getting more and more intense. Ryeowook cried and cried, hopefully no one could hear him free all his lust and want and love. Kyuhyun was the only one and for that he could never be judged.

The kisses on his chest were getting feverish just like the furious moves he was feeling, the pulsating member slipping in and out easily enough but never boring, the trails of that open-mouthed pecks ending under his jaw and leaving reddish signs as a mark of jealous possesion.

"Kyuhyun!" Ryeowook screamed. His hand firmly gripping Kyuhyun's hair as his partner stilled inside him and climaxed. He had become overly sensitive already, so that he hadn't felt Kyuhyun grabbing his length and pumping it rhythmically with his moves.

Ryeowook didn't understand he had just come, until he felt a thin trail of sticky liquid splattered between his and Kyuhyun's stomach. He was still riding his orgasm and didn't move, his legs still shaking too much.

Kyuhyun finally opened his eyes and looked down at the beautiful mess he had made of his lover.

Midnight. The full moon shone, queen of the night, over that deserted, little strand of sanndy beach. It was a dream of him, making love with his significant other during such a night and Kyuhyun finally did it.

They were in Jeju. Escaped from the public lights, Kyuhyun had wanted to spend a few of his convalescent days with the man he loved. After all, neither of them had work commitments to do - being one on the waiting list to join the army, the other free from work because of vocal nodules - neither of them had to join the Agency's celebratory trip to Hawaii.

However, that didn't stop them to still see each other before parting ways for two years and a half.

"I love it" Ryeowook croaked, still breathing hard, still brushing one hand on Kyuhyun's nail-marked back, the other into the auburn locks.

"I love it more because you consented to come with. It was difficult, but look at where we are" Kyuhyun smiled at Ryeowook, not feeling ready enough to pull out and simply taking his legit, comfortable spot on Ryeowook's chest, once in a while being cuddled instead of cuddling. 

Ryeowook sunk into the pillows scattered on the sheets laid onto the cold sand. He lifted his eyes to the sapphire blue sky and looked at the starry night. His eyes reflected the billions star infinitely sparkling and he sighed in contentment: "I regret turning you down for so long when you proposed this a few years ago"

Kyuhyun nodded, his cheek brushing on to Ryeowook's chest: "I love hearying you say that I am right"

"I didn't" Ryeowook scoffed.

"I thought I just heard you just plainly admit to liking me kidnapping you, bringing you to a deserted beach and making love" Kyuhyun finally moved. Ryeowook graned at the loss, but soon sighed again to manifest his happiness when Kyuhyun swapped places with him and, laying on his back, welcomed the petite one into his arms.

"I dreamed of our first kiss" Kyuhyun admitted, his eyes lost into the depths of the sky. 

Ryeowook took the covers and used them all to cover them both from the chilly night.

"You said it was a nightmare" he said, swiping his fingers across Kyuhyun's chest.

"It was!" Kyuhyun lamented, tightening his hug "In the dream you didn't stay the night and escaped my hug. In the dream you felt ashamed of what we had done, you felt at fault for loving me, you felt pressurized into thinking that everything happening between us was wrong" 

Ryeowook kissed his chest, ears tensed to every single feeling Kyuhyun was describing and feeling he himself bad for being the creator of such anxiety in his lover's dreams.

"What happened then?" he asked, caressing the scars on Kyuhyun's chest one after one, being extra soft at the memories that caused them all.

"You...don't want to know" Kyuhyun sighed, and almost strangled Ryeowook as the embrace got tighter and tighter than what actually possible.

"Tell me" Ryeowook demanded, nuzzling his nose under Kyuhyun's jaw and pecking infinite times on the warm skin "It's the only way to finally detatch yourself from the bitterness of the nightmare. You need to tell me" 

Kyuhyun stilled, lips tightened into a firm line, unwilling to disclose more details of the dream that he had had only a few hours before.

They had just made love for the first time that night and, contented of the result, they both basked in the aftermath of love, the usual feeling that shook and put them in place at once. They felt complete and happy for that, like many other times they were finally alone to enjoy each other presence, if not for the slumber that had hit Kyuhyun and made him sleep before Ryeowook, completed depleted of energy.

"In the dream..." Kyuhyun's lips parted to reveal "...I lost you" The taller's eyes widened at the memory. They silently roamed into the quietly sparkling sky.

"You were found lifeless in the gardens of the Hong Kong hotel we were staying at that time, and newspapers speculated that you suffered from a strong form of depression, when all I could think was that I had killed you. Because you felt crushed by the love towards me, and the needs of society, the fact that nearly no one would have approved of us, and..."

Ryeowook lifted on his arms and forced Kyuhyun to look back at him. The intensity of Ryeowook's gaze was too strong to bear and Kyuhyun felt speechless, his eyes lost into Ryeowook's fierce ones: "Shut up, idiot" the petite man snorted, leaning in and gently pressing his lips onto the other man's "It was just a dream"

"Still..." Kyuhyun whispered in great embarrassment, his lips again brushing against Ryeowook's.

"That was why you felt in need of making love to me once again tonight?" at the question Kyuhyun simply nodded, not wanting to sound any more desperate. His bangs mixed with Ryeowook's as the little one leant to rest his forehead against his lover's.

"I needed to feel you" Kyuhyun croaked, not ashamed of displaying his lovingly flushed cheeks and small smile to the man he loved "I needed to feel you near me"

"I'm always here" Ryeowook's nose played with the point of Kyuhyun's before he could once again peck at the plump lips and suck them briefly "You are the one I'll always want to be near to"

"I know" Kyuhyun sighed in relief, lips stretched into a more relaxed smile as his arms closed around Ryeowook's small back and pressed the sculpted, petite body against his stomach.

"Marry me, Kyu" Ryeowook whispered against Kyuhyun's lips, his eyes closed in the bliss of the moment so that he couldn't possibly see Kyuhyun's startled expression. With his chest wildly running against the scarred one of his lover, Ryeowook pressed his cheek onto Kyuhyun's and waited the answer in complete silence, only the lazy rolling waves breaking on the shore could be heard, as their infinite background lullaby.

"I will" Kyuhyun softly replied, closing his eyes as well and rocking Ryeowook into his arms "We need to decide the date, the venue and everything else though. You're leaving in a couple of months" he shrugged a bit.

"I just want you to be by my side" Ryeowook lifted his head and looked down at Kyuhyun "I want to do this right now - his hand caressed Kyuhyun's cheeks and his thumb slowly swiped on the man's lips parted a bit in awe - You said it, we don't have time to organize everything and, despite wanting to have friends and loved ones witnessing our love, I am fine with simply sharing vows between us for now. Will you be my husband till death do us apart, Cho Kyuhyun?"

"I will be even after that, Kim Ryeowook. I swear" Kyuhyun radiantly smiled as Ryeowook's hands were cupping his face and held him to seal the promise with yet another sweet kiss.

"Wait for me" Ryeowook spoke into the kiss. Kyuhyun breathed in his sweet scent, a mixture of vanilla gotten salty by the marine breeze and drops of perspiration. That scent drove him crazy and as he inhaled he promised to himself to faithfully wait for the return of his newly-appointed husband, only to share with the world, made of those who loved them, the news that they were together, had always been, and forever will.

They hugged each other strongly after that. Ryeowook was laid on his back as Kyuhyun still hovered him and caressed every inch of his warm body, softly whispering sweet nonsense and stronger promises. That man had always been the dream that made him shake in fright at the thought of losing him. That man had always been the dream that made him dwell in bliss and love. That man had always been his dream, and Kyuhyun just wished never to wake up.

2016_  Late Summer, nowadays


End file.
